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THE OTHER SIDE OF PREGNANCY AND EARLY PARENTHOOD

by

Ebitimi Igbaseimokumo

SYNOPSIS

During pregnancy most women would learn a lot about how their unborn baby is growing and how to care for the baby, but very little about their emotional state in coming to terms with the changes their lives will go through during early parenthood. Women are said to develop their maternal instinct as soon as the baby is born and feel a strong bond with the baby straight away.  Most women expect to, and do feel this bond or love for their babies from the start, which makes those who do not feel this way from the start, feel rather inadequate. The feelings after childbirth can range from euphoria to confusion, and over the following weeks a new mother may go through a few emotional changes, until she settles into her new lifestyle.

New motherhood is very rewarding but can also be very difficult, and this book encourages new mothers to talk about their conflicting emotions, in order to prevent them getting out of hand.

 

The purpose of this book is to help women understand the emotional state and needs of a new mother, so that they know what to expect and how to deal with their emotions during the early stages of parenthood.  To get a better understanding, I spoke to twenty young mothers about how they felt in pregnancy and early parenthood.  I have included the questions, where relevant, and some of the responses I got from the mothers.

 

PART CHAPTER

 

EMOTIONAL CHANGES IN PREGNANCY

Impending motherhood is bound to cause the expectant mother to think about the future, and this could cause anxiety, give her pleasure and other conflicting emotions.  You may even go through different emotions at different stages of the pregnancy.   The whole process takes the woman through a psychological transformation and developmental period, when she re-organizes her sense of self and identity.  This brings her onto a period of bonding with the child, and afterwards, identifying the child as a separate being from her.

 

BABY IS HERE - The process of bonding and separation.

The dreams of having a baby are frequently a far cry from the reality.  You will now be trying to come to terms with the birth and trying to understand your feelings, or maybe you have just put all the emotions on hold for the time being, and you are learning the practicalities of caring for your baby.  Everyone handles the first few days with a baby in a different way.  One thing is for certain, it will come as a bit of a shock to you.

 

Sometimes early parenthood takes a while to sink in. It is important to have early contact with your baby, because this is vital for creating that bond with your baby.

While you develop a bond with your baby it is also important to remember that your baby will be growing very fast and depending less on you.  You will need to allow yourself and your baby that flexibility to grow.  At the same time, you should try not to be in a rush for your baby to grow up.  Try to relax and enjoy every stage of your baby’s life, otherwise, when your baby is older you may feel you missed out on enjoying the earlier stages of his/her life.